REAL Ultimate Power: The Official Ninja Book

Finally, a true and factual book on the pure awesomeness of being a ninja. If you are a cool and awesome 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, or 12 years old this is a must book to study when you have 5 or 10 minutes time to learn how to become a true ninja. In fact, your teachers may insist you do a book report on it. OOPS, I forgot real ninjas have no use for school and school teachers according to the expert writer in this awesome book. In fact, according to this awesome volume you may be retarded if you desire to become anything other than a ninja.When I saw this 193 page black soft cover book (Real Ultimate Power: The official ninja book by Robert Hamburger) I knew it was going to be super cool man. The author begins explaining why he wrote this book on ninjas (because they are so awesome) and he moves on to some other awesome topics like: Part 1: Who are these guys and what’s their problem? Part 2: The real history of the ninjas (which will just blow your mind). Part 3: Ninjas every day: (about their super powers, ninja fantasies, romance and the ninjas). Part 4: Welcome to my dojo! (Joining a clan, becoming a ninja and ninja kicks are covered in this awesome section). Don’t forget to read the appendix and exhibits section which has a super cool glossary and of course there is also an awesome quiz to make sure you have learned everything in this complete guide to ninjas. The awesome thing about being a ninja is you do not need to attend a regular school to learn reading, writing and math. Those subjects are retarded according to this book. Just find a ninja master to train with to learn everything you need to become a super cool (and of course AWESOME) ninja.In conclusion, this very humorous approach to ninjas made me laugh enough I just had to give it 4 stars. So get pumped up and prepare for a goofy, ironic and crazy ninja read.Rating: 4 Stars. Joseph J. Truncale (Author: Martial Art and Warrior Haiku and Senryu).

This book had my PUMPED UP all the time. In fact I got so pumped reading this book that I had to go chill out and get a baby carrot out of the freezer. I can't believe all the great stuff I learned from this book. I learned how to fly, how to turn invisible, how to battle Vikings, Pirates, Moms, and sometimes baby sitters. If a viking ever tries to mess with me again, take it from me and Robert Hamburger...he would get a huge surprise, how about a six foot boner uppercut?!? Oh man, and if a Pirate came onto land and tried to take away one of my many hot babes using his stupid lasers....I'd probably scratch his eyes out or shoot some bio-slime at his crotch. Then I'd haul out my guitar and WAIL...HARD while I porked some totally hot babes. This book is only for those who are willing to get totally pumped, so if you are a stupid idiot you should not buy this book. It also helps if you've gone through puberty...it's not required but it is bragable. I would recommend this book to all my friends who are as cool as ninjas and who want to pop like a million boners....AND WOULDN'T EVEN THINK TWICE ABOUT IT!

Did you know that Robert Hamburger doesn't even exist?Real Ultimate Power is actually a project by a bunch of sophomores at Grimy Ridge Community College, which is just outside of Kings Row, Pensylvania.Grimy Ridge Community College, or GRCC, as I will refer to it, is actually funded by the Japanese Association of Ninpo and Ninjitsu (JAONAN). It is also funded by private donations, also. From some internet research that I did, I found that many of the donations come from martial arts masters from various martial arts.I was wondering why so much funding would come from sources like that. My only guess is that the real ninja masters have some purpose that is unknown at this time.Overall I find the content of the book stellar.However, I am rating this review only four stars, because I would like to see the book and the website have more techniques in them. I found the content very interesting, but it focuses too much on the lifestyle of the ninjas and not enough on their actual technique. But, I did find porking a lot of hot babes very interesting, so maybe I'm being too harsh with my four star review.

With REAL ULTIMATE POWER, Robert Hamburger has written a great mocking treatise on everything Ninja, using the topic to pick apart the freaky passions of the pre, or near, pubescent male in western society. Of course, this is assuming that "Hamburger" is indeed a pen name; if not, an explanation using intentional fallacy must come into play... The epitome of satire is being named among those one satirizes, thus with the current moniker of "Frat-Lit," it seems Hamburger has completed his mission. Will he rest among the great satirists such as Swift, Dryden, Twain, Orwell, or even Groening? Perhaps not. Yet while Robert Hamburger may be young in years, he is no child, and there should be a regarded place for his work. And a great work it is. It is too easy to "after-the-fact" pick apart the banal aspects of REAL ULTIMATE POWER; much harder to find the deeper meaning among the interstices.Then again, I've not laughed out loud as much during a reading in many years. This may be a sign of a personal lack of taste, or perhaps even an indictment of low art. However, the astute reader will surely find the value hidden in this work.

An amazing book.I loved the website...in years first time I saw it.I have to keep it locked away as I can get a bit too pumped reading it.If you like Ninjas and you like getting pumped (not in a sexual way) and flipping out then this...is a book about it!

Super sweet!

I think this book is quite good.It's quite funny and says alot about make believe ninjas.Robert clearly knows more then he lets in on, like his intersperced chinese short fables and what have you.I wasn't offended by this book but I don't know anything about martial arts so there. I think it's good for a laugh at least cheers, Johnr

Ich mache es kurz, wer die Internetseite kennt und lustig findet, ist mit diesem Buch genau richtig beraten. Der Stil ist famos, der Inhalt kreativ.Für mich eines der lustigsten Bücher, die ich je gelesen habe. Einzuordnen in der Kategorie: "Mitten in der Straßenbahn laut loslachen"!

Great book very funny