The Emotionally Exhausted Woman: Why You’re Feeling Depleted and How to Get What You Need Paperback – November 1, 2022

This book was suggested to me by a friend who recently read it and said it helped her. After it arrived, I started skimming it and found myself intrigued by the stories. Without intending to, I read the entire book in one sitting.The book is well-written but easy to understand without any psychobabble or simplistic suggestions often found in self-help books. The most helpful part was that the writer outlined the underlying issues that lead to emotional exhaustion—for example, trying to keep everyone you love happy and feeling guilty when you don't. Why does this happen? This book explains it.I also really love the stories, which were so real and relatable.It was so helpful, I bought three more copies to give to my sisters and stepmom. I think we all need this book!Highly recommend!

I loved this book. Its advice will stick with me for a long time. Nancy Colier's truly excellent book nails the problem many of us are facing--we're sapped, we give a lot to others, and we hold onto the world's critical, judgy voices that keep us depleted. Colier, a psychotherapist who has written extensively on well-being, provides calm, wise and actionable advice aimed to help people attend to the exhaustion and change their approach to live life more fully. At the core, she advocates a new way of looking at "self-care," not just taking time out or going to a spa for a weekend, but being truly self-caring. She offers helpful examples to illustrate the steps to take in learning how to care ABOUT one's self, not a quick-fix, but an important, eye-opening journey.

OK i have consumed ALL the healing, therapeutic content out there. I can't get over this book. I immediately bought a copy for my mom, both my sisters, and have already recommended it to 3 friends. I haven't encountered any other book that so effectively names, breaks down, and gives steps forwards for the epidemic of stressed out, at-their-wits-end, doing-everything-for-everyone-else women that are all around me. It breaks down all these false narratives I realize I've had about myself and held myself to (at my own detriment!!) for probably my entire life. I consumed this book in a weekend, and since have been able to set better boundaries, doing things because I WANT to do them and not because I'm obligated, and actually just feeling like I have time to BREATHE. I can't stop recommending this book to friends because it seems that every time I chat with a new friend, they bring up some self-neglecting, or exhausting cycle they are stuck in, and this book feels like the most relevant thing in all our lives. I summarized my favorite takeaways from it into 6 points, wrote in on a paper and hung it at my dining table so it's the first thing I see to start every day. Cannot recommend enough.

This is a very valuable resource for women, especially those who are feeling burnout, excess stress, and a general feeling of being unfulfilled. A lot of these feelings stem from unmet, and sometimes even unacknowledged, needs. Generally speaking, women aren't encouraged to have needs, let alone to pursue getting them met. The author skillfully breaks down how we're inundated almost from birth with expectations to deny our needs, push them down in order to serve others, and to think of ourselves as bad for even having them in the first place. It felt so very validating to have lifelong messages I've received put into words and called out.After defining why women tend to have unmet needs, the author then tackles the prevailing concept of self-care. They rightfully examine the folly of somehow being able to overcome a lifetime in a society that expects women to please others and stay undemanding with foot baths and hot yoga. What we currently call "self-care" is just another set of tasks for women and one more thing to feel inadequate about.Where I felt this was a little lacking was when it came to what to actually DO about the problem. They advocated for radical self-acceptance, boundaries, and honest communication, but it felt like the advice dried up a bit after "acknowledge that you have needs." Some exercises to help get to that point would have been helpful, as well as more examples of how women implemented these ideas in their lives. That being said, this is still something every women would benefit from reading and I highly recommend picking it up!Many thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review!

I've been studying how women characteristically defer to others' needs and thus lose their authenticity and inner freedom. Although this limiting dynamic resonates with my own thoughts and actions both historically and currently, it was not until I read The Emotionally Exhausted Woman by Nancy Colier that I truly recognized myself in the numerous examples of women succumbing to this restricting role. Colier enhances the readers' understanding of each personally-depreciating word or action with empathetic and psychological insights so that we can fully understand how the many aspects of these paralyzing behaviors play out in our lives. But she doesn't leave us there. Like a benevolent coach, Colier encourages each of us to appreciate the value of identifying our needs and of finding our voice so we can express what is important to us and clarify our boundaries. The author assures us that it is possible to embrace our personal sovereignty while respecting the needs of those around us in order to lead a mutually meaningful and fulfilling life. The Emotionally Exhausted Woman is a gift for all women. Thank you, Nancy Colier