Parenting a Child Who Has Intense Emotions

Our grandson's therapist suggested this book. It's incredibly well-written and packed with useful information that we found very helpful.

This book is a must read for anyone who has a child with intense emotions. The book has helped him as well as myself.

I (child's mother) have been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and have gone to all sorts of counseling. The ONLY thing that has ever truly helped me was Dialectical Behavior Therapy. So when we started noticing behaviors in our now 5 year old son that he was afraid of his own emotions and reactions and had trouble controlling it, we searched for DBT for kids. Before we got this book, we tried to get advice from friends and family but everyone thought that we were exaggerating the problem and that he just needed to be "disciplined" more. We tried so many things as he had serious issues since he was 2 years old, but we could see he was suffering. Finally one of our relatives opened up to me that she has 4 children and one of them is very very different from the others, and she now understands what we have been trying to explain about our son for years. One of her children, like our son, is very sensitive and cries from the slightest thing like we're out of the cereal he wanted to eat. They aren't throwing a fit, they are just deeply distraught and you can see the look of panic on their faces that they don't know how to stop crying. I have seen a few times when this other child would go off by herself when she was crying uncontrollably (she didn't want attention) and when I walked over to her she said "I don't know why I'm crying. It doesn't make any sense." I, as someone who has Borderline can understand this. I don't want to be upset. I realize that it isn't logical and that it is an over-reaction, but actually, this realization makes it even harder to get control. We bought this book for my relative and they said it has changed their whole approach to parenting for their intensely emotional child, as it has for us.

I've read a few different books trying to find ways to more successfully parent my highly emotional, sensitive child. This one did the best job helping me understand the issue, accept the limits of what she and I am capable of, and accept my child for who she is while also trying to help her improve her behavior. It provided some practical strategies for how to use consequences and rewards to help shape her behavior, and how to respond in the moment during her outbursts. I felt less alone and felt validated in our family's struggles when reading this book. The authors are practical and matter-of-fact, and they convey messages in an understandable language.

Very helpful.