The Happiness Project (Revised Edition): Or, Why I Spent a Year Trying to Sing in the Morning, Clean My Closets, Fight Right, Read Aristotle, and Generally Have More Fun Paperback – December 29, 2015

Yes, I'm four years behind on finding this book, but I'm so glad that I finally caught up!I don't think this book needs a synopsis at this point - at 780 reviews and counting, it's been done. I'll just cover what I enjoyed about it.I think what makes Rubin's writing so appealing is that she admits that she isn't perfect; she's not afraid to show her ugly side instead of painting a picture of sunshine and rainbows. I really identified with her when she spoke about wishing she would like something because others did. I have often wished I:•Was a morning person•Could be the person who picks out her outfits the night before•Could be the person who picks out her outfits for the week on Sundays and prepared them•Wrapped gifts beautifully•Could drive without ever getting upset with another driver•Save money•Enjoyed volunteering•Cared if my bag matched my shoes•Enjoyed going to see rock bands•Enjoyed making my own smoothies everyday•Enjoyed the raw food dietBut I'm not any of those things. I have accepted that I will likely always be a night person, that I made the right decision to sell my Vitamix (after only using it a handful of times over 2 years), and that I would rather donate money then have to show up at a place at an assigned time to volunteer. This is who I am, and that's okay - the world needs me and the world needs the person who is all of the things I'm not.Favorite moments from the book:•What you do every day matters more than what you do once in a while.•You don't have to be good at everything.•With extrinsic motivation, people act to win external rewards or avoid external punishments; with intrinsic motivation, people act for their own satisfaction. Studies show that if you reward people for doing an activity, they often stop doing it for fun; being paid turns it into "work."•The repetitive activity of walking, studies who, triggers the body's relaxation response and so helps reduce stress; at the same time, even a quick ten-minute walk provides an immediate energy boost and improves mood - in fact, exercises is an effective way to snap out of a funk.•Also, having few clothing choices made me feel happier. Although people believe they like to have lots of choice, in fact, having too many choices can be discouraging. Instead of making people feel more satisfied, a wide range of options can paralyze them.•I'd been self-righteously telling myself that I did certain chores or made certain efforts "for Jamie" or "for the team." Though this sounded generous, it led to a bad result, because I sulked when Jamie didn't appreciate my efforts. Instead, I started to tell myself, "I'm doing this for myself. This is what I want."•Perhaps because men have this low standard for what qualifies as intimacy, both men and women find relationships with women to be more enjoyable than those with men. In fact, for both men and women, the most reliable predictor of not being lonely is the amount of contact with women. Time spent with men doesn't make a difference.•Learning that men and women both turn to women for understanding showed me that Jamie wasn't ignoring me out of lack of interest or affection; he just wasn't good at giving that kind of support.•I've never forgotten something I read in college, by Pierre Reverdy: "There is no love; there are only proofs of love." Whatever love I might feel in my heart, others will see only my actions.•"Feeling right" is about living the life that's right for you - in occupation, location, marital status, and so on.•When thinking about happiness in marriage, you may have an almost irresistible impulse to focus on your spouse, to emphasize how he or she should change in order to boost your happiness. But the fact is, you can't change anyone but yourself.•"Between the ages of twenty and forty we are engaged in the process of discovering who we are, which involves learning the difference between accidental limitations which it is our duty to outgrow and the necessary limitations of our nature beyond which we cannot trespass with impunity." (Auden)•Studies show that people tend to persevere longer with problems they've been told are difficult as opposed to easy.•In fact, researchers reported that out of fifteen daily activities, they found only one during which people were happier alone rather than with other people - and that was praying.•Studies show that because of this psychological phenomenon, people unintentionally transfer to me the traits I ascribe to other people. So if I tell Jean that Pat is arrogant, unconsciously Jean associates that quality with me...What I say about other people sticks to me - even when I talk to someone who already knows me.•I'd noticed idly that a lot of people use the term "goal" instead of "resolution," and one day in December, it struck me that the difference was in fact significant. You hit a goal, you keep a resolution.Needless to say, I identified with a lot of what she wrote. I loved the book. Rubin also has a website where you can download examples of her resolution charts.Highly recommend.

With The Happiness Project, Gretchen Rubin has created more than a book, she has created an entire ecosystem of happiness. Before the book, Gretchen spent a year blogging about happiness. Blog comments were incorporated into the book. The blog continues with rich insights about the truths that she learned. You can find it at [...].As if a book and a blog were not enough, Gretchen has generously created a tool set to help you apply The Happiness Project principles into your life. It can be found at [...] . There you can write your own set of happiness Resolutions or join with other people in a Group Resolution. You can write your own list of Personal Commandments and share your Secrets of Adulthood. You can make your own lists (I recorded my bucket list) or share your insights through Happiness Hacks or the Inspiration Board. Even more fun than recording your own thoughts is to read what others have written. If it is true that none of us is as smart as all of us, there is a lot to be learned from the other people who are sharing their journey at [...] .I first learned of Gretchen Rubin when I heard her interview on NPR. After checking into her web site, I picked up the book and (as cliché as this may be to say) found myself unwilling to put it down. She's an authentic story teller. I could empathize with her daily struggles. Her life felt like my life. I think that's the secret to great writing. Gretchen allows others to live along side her as if they were a member of her family.All in all, I would recommend The Happiness Project, not just for the wonderful story telling, or the amazing insights, but for the total happiness ecosystem that Gretchen has so generously created.

In this book, Gretchen Rubin documents her year-long quest to figure out what steps one can take to increase happiness. Rubin's journey is very personal, thoroughly researched, fun, easy-to-read yet full of challenges. I delighted in learning about Rubin's process. Likewise, I am thoroughly amazed by the amount of energy Rubin put into this project and her seemingly unlimited appetite for knowledge. The basic premise is simple - -- "To thine own self be true" (or in Rubin's case, "Be Gretchen"). Rather than over-simplify and deal in generalities, Rubin outlines very concrete and specific steps that one can take to be more happy, some ("pursue a passion", "laugh out loud") more obvious than others ("buy some happiness", "read memoirs of catastrophe").What I particularly liked:-The book is well-researched -- there are plenty of references to classical and not-so-classical literature, quotations from the world's great thinkers, masterful interweaving of literature into the text, and a superb list of books for further reading. (This may be part of the author's need for "legitimacy" -- as if references St. Therese and Boethius let us know that even though she is writing on the seemingly-light topic of happiness, she is an educated scholar at heart.)-It's very personal -- Rubin discusses her sister's diagnosis of diabetes, her husband's hepatitis C, her father's perhaps-feigned delight over take-out pizza for dinner, the ruby slippers and cows on her wedding invitations, her struggle with spending money to purchase nice roller-ball ink pens (when free ball points labeled with drug names are readily available). Rubin discusses her need for approval, her pursuit of "legitimacy" and gold stars, her preference for children's literature. She talks of her personal successes and "failures" (disappointment in the sales of one of her books), her particular passion for white v-neck tee shirts. Rubin shares more personal information with her readers that I share with people I consider close friends.-It's conversational -- When reading this, I could imagine sitting in the living room with Rubin, drinking diet Cokes and discussing the pressing issues of the day -- why it's important for adults to read D. H. Barrie, the joy of a nicely bound set of books, the delight of a new pen. Although Rubin is obviously well-read and superbly-educated, her writing is conversational and very accessible; she delights in sharing what she's learned rather than showing us how dang smart she is.Overall, this was one of the most delightful books I've read in a long time, providing plenty of food for thought. Highly recommended.